Life is one shot

2012-01-31T07:43:00.001-08:00

I'm afraid to be alone, I'm afraid not to be alone. I'm afraid of what I am, what I'm not, what I might become, what I might never become. I don't want to stay at my job for the rest of my life, but I'm afraid to leave. And I'm just tired, you know? I'm just so tired of being afraid.”

2012-01-13T03:24:00.000-08:00

I just didnt expect it. How does it feels like to be backstabbed again and again
and even after that, you can still smile to me and say that u like me so much.

It is digusting.

2011-12-26T12:55:00.000-08:00

So much thoughts ...
I'm so greedy, i never know how to be contented in my life.
I feel that i don't deserve to feel this way though.
Its damn unfair, damn damn unfair.

I am so upset now, angry with myself.
What am I

2011-12-22T08:39:00.000-08:00

I want to be a person without emotion.
That way, i won't feel any pain anymore.

2011-12-16T05:51:00.000-08:00

I'm not coping well, I feel like i am falling.
How do i stop negativity from overflowing?

2011-12-05T04:26:00.000-08:00

Had dinner with my lisa and shuhui ~
Aston was great and super filling!!!
catching up with each other was great too :)

2011-12-02T11:17:00.001-08:00

I miss you yimama...
really love you alot

2011-11-24T08:01:00.001-08:00

My weakness is myself.

shynesssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss overwhelming!!!!

2011-10-13T08:45:00.001-07:00

What am i

2011-08-30T09:04:00.000-07:00

It has been 2months since i started working.

So far so good~ i wanna try harder, work harder, rmb things faster!!

Life is one shot.

Its too sad to regret anything that has alrdy been done!!

2011-08-01T08:12:00.001-07:00

Life is one shot, therefore i'm gonna try hard.
I am responsible for my own life, if i dont make it happen, who will?

2011-07-28T07:23:00.000-07:00

At times i just feel like screaming my lungs off.

Im still pondering why i join nursing.

No passion but willing to learn will it go smoothly?

sometime its confusing and i can't realli comprehead what my heart, my mind , my soul really wants..

Im still figuring what i want to acheive in life for the next 2years.. to go for diploma in nursing or quit nursing and go on other lines.

Nursing is no joke, i got the bear all the shits,anger,smells from work but when there is patient telling me thank you, they appreciate alot.. my heart just sank to the deepest of all...

im touched.. and im holding onto it, trying hard..

Im might be slow i am new and i might be clumsy but im definitely not lazy.

2011-06-28T08:26:00.000-07:00

I'm giving myself 365days to get into diploma in nursing.

Never say die, but i'll whine and complain when im frustrated.

hwaiting lee kun linzi!!!!!

2011-06-19T09:51:00.001-07:00

I think i know why people tend to run away problem than to face it.

Its because they are guilty, they wanna save their pride.

Recently my mood realli sux ttm, i got this problem ever since im 18.
Now and then i'll flare up suddenly then become guilty and i feel like shitz

No matter how much i tell myself not to do the other time round but i still
vent my anger on my loves one. Im so sorry .. any1 has this problem? mind sharing..

realli feeling v sucky now

Wisom tooth extraction

2011-05-13T13:49:00.000-07:00

After a year of torment by my lower jaw right side wisdom tooth.
I finally did the surgery!

It got infected couple times a year and i ignore it and thought i was 'heaty' after much thought over the problem that always affect me. I finally went to visit a dentist and got an xray done. True enough! It was an impacted wisdom tooth. Its quite bad but luckily its not rotting. Dentist said that i'd to get a surgery done in order to remove it and it need to be done as soon as possible.

Due to my fears of visiting a dentist, i think majority are afraid of dentist. lol!
I delay it for 1 year and i finally could not take the discomfort, pain and consistent headache and swelling. I decided to get it done!

It was done after my graduation day. It was not really a very good exprience but the dentist was very clear cut and explained what he will do and cut.

I was afraid of needles and I'd to get my LA done :( I actually didnt feel any pain when he is injecting the painkillers into my gums but the thought of having a needle poke into my flesh just scares me so much!

After injecting. I actually thought he alrdy cut through my gum and extracted the whole tooth out! But i was SO WRONG! He haven even proceed yet! I was told to rinse my mouth and i asked, " Why am i not bleeding? " LOL then i realise that the operation didnt even start yet, he's just trying to poke and check whether im having any sensation anot.

My half face was numbed throughout & my dentist finally starteed the op.
My mouth could not even open wide enough and he has to use a clamp to keep it open.
LOL i feel like im in D&T lesson and my jaw and mouth is aching cuz i have to keep it open for 1hour.

For the whole procedure. He is using a machine that is used to cut my tooth into pieces, He told me that my tooth actually sets in deeper than the Xray shows, but luckily he get it all out.

I finally finish the whole operation. Not much swelling and pain.

After i reached home, I was so tired so i went to sleep. Through out my whole night i could not sleep well due to the pain. Had painkillers but it did not even help! What worse is my LA is worn off! OMG. I feel like crying at that moment but i could cry because my jaw is hurting so much and i could not move half face -.- Doing so will hurt it even more.

Then i finally fall asleep after struggling till 6am.

Its my 2nd day. My face is much much swollen than post op day 1.
I could not sleep due to the discomfort cause by the swelling. I hope i'll get better
on Day 3 :(